


Burn

by HeylelAndGoldenWings



Category: Turn: Washington’s Spies
Genre: Angst, Loosely based off Burn from Hamilton, M/M, Other, Sad, angsty, mentions of sex I guess, really fucking sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 10:04:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14518092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeylelAndGoldenWings/pseuds/HeylelAndGoldenWings
Summary: It was all a joke to Caleb and Ben, wasn’t it?***Caleb and Ben would never do anything like this, but I needed to vent. That’s mainly why I made this. Make what you must out of this, it’s just me being sorry for myself.





	Burn

**Author's Note:**

> If you’d like I can totally make more stories... just comment, I suppose.

Abraham stared at the shifting fire. He was struggling not to fall asleep— his eyes just barely staying open, dripping with wet tears. His hands wrapped around pieces of paper, about two or three in each, crumpled as much as possible.

 

Mary was asleep somewhere upstairs, and he could hear the slight sobbing of Thomas near her. Soon she’d awake, take Thomas in her arms and cradle him, whisper how much she loved him, and set him back down until he was ready to sleep again. 

 

Abraham threw one of the pieces of paper into the crackling flames, a tiny whimper escaping him. Stupid Ben. Stupid Caleb. Stupid, stupid, stupid. 

 

It had all started when Abraham had met—or re-met— Caleb Brewster. The laughter they shared, the way Caleb oh-so-kindly called Abraham _ Woody,  _ just like the good old days. And then… something else started when he had been taken hostage. Well, sort of.  Ben had come back, come  _ home-  _ not their true home in Setauket, but home in Abe’s heart- home in his eyes and hands and ears and breath. And all the love that Abraham had ever felt for him came rushing back, just like it had for Caleb. 

 

And yet, here he was, months later, watching their letters burn. He had saved every letter they had written him. He had thought they were his. He had nobody to tell, nobody to cry to— not even his boy, Thomas.  Now, if his brother was still alive… maybe. But no. He was dead. Dead because of Abraham. 

 

Abe let the papers drop, littering the floor. He tugged at his hair, relishing the pain that briefly shocked his head. There was no hiding now— if Mary came down stairs, she would see Abraham at his worst. She would see how broken he was, how hurt and rubbed raw and stressed.  Maybe she would take him in her arms, tell him she loved him- loved him even if he could not love her back. Loved him to the ends of the earth. Loved him even if he loved Caleb and Ben and not her. Loved him, like he could not love himself. Not now, at least. 

 

Why would they do it? Why would they ever  _ do such a thing.  _ One minute, they were his. Every chance they got, they’d kiss and hold hands and unconditionally love each other. And then the next minute, they were just… gone. It went from:

 

_ Our dearest, Samuel Culper. We have so much to tell you.  Something quite brilliant happened today. We were walking through a forest and saw the first blooming flowers since last March. Quite a sight it was. Some were pink, others a dazzling yellow— like the sun. We couldn’t help thinking of you, our love for you.  The way you smile, laugh— the way you choke, moan… come.  _

 

_ With all our love, _

_ C. and B. _

 

Then, not even three weeks later:

 

_ We have decided it best if it’s just the two of us. We hope dearly that you will continue to spy for us, Mr. Culper, but you, as of now, our no longer ours.  _

 

_ Sincerely, _

_ C. and B. _

 

Of course, there had been and abundance of letters in between… but…

 

Abraham leaned forward, collecting the letters. He would keep the first one that expressed their love to him. And the last one they had sent. The only two that really mattered, so that maybe, someday, historians would see the love they had once shared, however briefly. 

 

The rest, he chuckled into the fire. He watched as the burned, and once if was done, he turned, setting the last two letters he had left where the others had been before. 

 

Abraham picked up a pen, and wrote his heart out.

 

_ My loves, you can’t mean it. This has to be a joke. A prank. Somebody must have gotten the wrong letter or found out about me spying. This must just be a jab of fun you two are having. A hearty laugh. Why, why would you ever do this? Don’t you know I would do anything for you? I would join the Revolution, right now. I would die for you— live for you. Anything, anything you wanted. Leave Mary and Thomas, no matter how much I love my boy. What cruel spirit has taken over your minds? _

 

_ With only love, _

_ Samuel Culper.  _

 

Abraham stood, grabbed his cloak, and set out to find Caleb and Ben. Maybe if they saw him once more, they would change their minds. 

 

Or maybe it really was just a joke. Not the letter- but the whole relationship. And that’s all it ever had been. 

 

Abraham’s heart broke a million times more at the thought. 

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
